A day at the Red Barn Farm

The other day at the Red Barn Farm, I was giving my normal tour to elementary school children. Just as I was escorting them to the restroom to have them wash their hands, I noticed they were not behind me. Several were distracted by something near the mule barn. That caused others to investigate. Pretty soon, I was standing by wondering what my children were examining.

Then I heard the word snake.

Well, being Farmer Kelly and wanting to present a good impression to the children, I made a conscious decision to pick up the snake. See, we teach the children that Black Snakes are the farmer's friend because they eat the mice and rats that eat the animals feed and grain. They also are territorial and keep away other "bad" snakes.

I figured that if we teach that Black Snakes are good, then why shouldn't I accept this snake as any other barnyard animal and pick it up. I pick up the chickens, the pigs, the lambs, the calves (okay, push them around), the ducks and the geese (when they aren't attacking me). All of those animals are friends of the farmer. So, I picked it up.

Outside, I told the children all the wonderful things that Black Snakes do for the farmer. Inside, I kept thinking "WHAT AM I DOING? I SHOULD NEVER HAVE PICKED THIS THING UP!!" Another farmer tour guide, Judy, asked me to hang on while she got her camera. In my best I-am-not-worried voice, I said okay. Inside, I was screaming, "HURRY UP!"

While telling the children all the wonderful things about the snake, I noticed it kept sliding its head out of my grasp. I had to make adjustments to keep its head in control. Its body touched me bare arm and I was surprised at how cold it was. That's probably why it was so easy to catch: it was cold. Still waiting on Judy, I stood there and let the children touch it. I was careful to keep its head securely in my hand. Oh yeah, I was wearing gloves. No way would I have picked it up without gloves. Anyway, the children were fascinated.

Then it maneuvered its body around my leg and really grabbed hold. Even though I knew in my mind that this was a friendly snake and not a poisonous snake nor a constrictor, I was distressed having it securely affixed around my thigh.

"Oh, Judy. You really need to hurry up. Farmer Kelly really wants to put this guy down."

"Oh Kelly, I'm sorry. I forgot my camera today. Go ahead and put it down."

"Thanks, Judy." Hmmm, thanks a whole hell of a lot. "Okay, children. Farmer Kelly is now going to let this big guy go on about his business. I'll just put him right back where I found him. Okay."

After that, just as smooth as you please, I lead the children off to the restrooms to wash hands before lunch. They all thought I was absolutely amazing. Inside, my stomach was flippy-floppy and my heart was pounding.

Seriously, though....WHAT WAS I THINKING?!